A PERSONAL SHARE AND A CALL TO ACTION

4/9/2024

A couple of weeks ago, I found myself pouring out something deeply personal and vulnerable in my beautiful private Sacred Thyme Alchemy Facebook group.

In sharing this piece of myself, I’ve realized how it has strengthened and amplified my voice as an advocate for others, especially on the critical issue of Domestic Violence and Mental Wellness within Aotearoa.

I felt a surge of urgency to share this with you all because it’s crucial that we continue to shed light on these important issues. By being open and honest, we not only heal ourselves, but we also get to empower others who may be struggling in silence.

Our collective voices can create waves of change. Let’s keep the conversation going, stand up for those who need us, and remain steadfast in our commitment to justice, healing, and true advocacy.

 Let’s keep making a difference, one voice at a time.

In the midst of all the polite chatter and well-meaning facades, I refuse to stay silent.

My voice, raw and determined, is speaking out against domestic violence and the nasty mind games played by those who should be your partners, not your tormentors.

There are times when speaking up feels like shouting into a void. Not because my cause isn’t right, but because the people behind these awful acts often hold power or are protected by systems that should be on our side.

It feels like I’m fighting this battle alone sometimes, with the very organizations that should be pushing for change too often choosing to stay quiet.

I won’t put up with this any longer.

Maybe some people’s lack of experience with this kind of cruelty leads them to believe it's just fiction. But it’s high time we shatter that illusion.

Silence isn’t a safe haven; it’s a prison for those suffering—those who are silently screaming for someone to notice, to understand, to stand with them.

I remember recently, I spoke up about how much I hate a line from an old film—“Cook me some f**king eggs.”

You may all know it, while many see it as funny, one of the greatest movie lines ever, just a throwaway line, for me, it’s a painful reminder of words that were used against me with a promise of hurt.

When I shared this, the room fell silent. It was a harsh reminder that even in spaces where we’re supposed to talk openly, conversations about abuse are often avoided, as if acknowledging the truth might upset the status quo. It "makes me uncomfortable" so lets just change the subject so its not awkward. Are you feeling me?

In organizations meant to support and be there for our communities—places focused on mental health, youth leadership, and nurturing our future generations—there’s a troubling trend of paying lip service rather than taking real action.

It’s not about offending anyone; it’s about-facing uncomfortable truths and holding people accountable.

We need to challenge the culture of complicity and outdated attitudes that still linger. And let me be clear: this isn’t about feminism or painting all abusers with the same brush.

It’s about holding ourselves and our institutions to a higher standard, no matter who they are or where they stand.

It stops with us.

We have to push past the fear of backlash and the worry of stepping on toes.

We need to face these tough realities with courage and integrity. If we’re going to claim to be leaders and advocates, we need to live up to those values in every action we take.

The cost of staying silent, of letting abuse continue under the guise of politeness, is far too high.

The time for half-hearted gestures and empty reassurances is over.

It’s time to stand firm, to be the voice for those who can’t be heard, and to make sure that justice and empathy aren’t just words, but actions.

This is a fight we can’t afford to lose.

It’s a battle we must win—for every silent scream and every broken heart.

Thoughts to ponder.

Thank you for being part of this journey with me.

Much love and respect x